Tim's Blog. Stardate 62998.1.

Today was supposed to be the $84 “Level 9” tour of the Houston and Johnson Space Centers. Unfortunately things went awry as soon as I arrived. They had, apparently, over subscribed the Level 9 tours, due to a computer malfunction. How very ironic. (Well it would be, if they understood irony here. That makes it even more ironic. You could almost cut the irony with a knife in fact).

The Level 9 tour, by the way, is limited to 12 people per tour, and there are 2 tours per day. They last all day. The tour consists of a guided visit through all the working areas of the facilities, the opportunity to lunch with the astronauts – and is not open to persons under the age of 14. And was my only reason for visiting Houston.

Due to the computer error, it meant that I could not go on the tour. So they refunded my $84, and also gave me a free entry into the rest of the facilities (a $24 value) – and boy am I glad it was free.

The Space Center experience (apart from the Level 9 tour) is designed solely for children – and I can understand why they do this, (most of the children that visited today will be adults when we next go to the moon) it’s a theme park really. (Plus they have to raise funds somewhere, as I'm quite sure the lefties in charge now can't see the point in space exploration when there's a perfectly good healthcare system to take over and ruin). Sure there was a little bus ride through the Johnson Space Center, where the real work goes on, but I could only watch from behind glass as the Level 9 people proceeded through the actual working facilities, guided by a few professional looking, um, professionals. Having been twice to the Space Center theme park that is Kennedy in Florida, I had no real desire to repeat the experience at the smaller venue in 100 degree heat in Houston. Incidentally, Kennedy makes a good visit adult or child. Houston, really - just for the children. (Unless you go Level 9). There were bouncy castles in the main exhibition hall. Cameron would have loved it! But its not really for the adults.

My face print on the glass, and the odd fart was the closest I got to find out about the new programme to the moon, and how the recession and the lefties were going to affect Nasa’s future…. But I did find out some very useful information though, Amy (sitting behind me on the tour bus who was from the local high school) was in love with Eric.

Anyone who knows me, understands how much I like this country, its people, and its culture. In fact, I should have been born here – I could be a foreign Ambassador. (In fact, I have thought of my perfect job – being in charge of getting American cars made better for European roads. The American companies are hell bent on trying to crack the UK market, and keep wondering why they fail so miserably at it – I could sort this out for them! I can fix it! Just send the Tahoe!!! Or maybe not... but I could fix that too!). Anyway, I blame my parents for having me in England. Its all their fault.

One of the great things about America is the differences between people – all of the different cultures that have come together to make the place what it is today; the most multi-cultural country on the planet. One thing that everyone here remembers, regardless of colour or creed, is that they are American – and that means more to them than anything; and it’s a good thing. Being proud of one’s country is a great thing.

British people could learn a lot from this.

Unfortunately, as I have travelled around, I have been getting the feeling that America is somehow losing some of her national pride, or, hmmm, just not as outgoing as she was before? Perhaps it’s the constant battering she receives from the idiotic Enviro-Euro-Commies, or the recession? Or maybe its just me… maybe she is as patriotic as before, and I’m just not noticing anymore… July 4th is this coming weekend, so hopefully I’ll get to see some good fireworks and patriotic celebrations. America has a lot to be very proud of, and I'll be celebrating it right along with them.

So I was listening to K I L T radio this morning (The Station That Plays the Most Country Music – and no, Rutter, Hootie and the Blowfish were not on. (But their lead singer was!) aaaggggghhhhh they are not Country!) – not sure why its KILT radio? Perhaps when you lift up the covers, all you see is a bunch of assholes? They sounded ok to me though. (The people, not the assholes). Pretty entertaining. In Texas, you have to listen to Country. It’s the law. That and really its your only choice on the radio, they simply don’t broadcast anything else...

Speaking of the law. The five-o are out in force in Texas for sure, they’re bloody everywhere. They aren’t wearing Stetsons though, as you would expect… how disappointing.

Speaking of bloody. I have just been for the most expensive hair cut I have ever had ($14!!!!!). That and my scalp is now in shreds on the floor. The warm feeling on my head and down my neck as the lady sliced the clippers back and forth burying the head deep into my scalp was the blood pouring from new wounds. Actually she was a lovely lady, of Spanish descent who was telling me about her regular French customer (lets call him Jack) who spoke fluent Spanish. Jack, apparently, worked for one of the local oil companies.

By the time she had finished, she had trimmed my eyebrows as they were so long (was saving those to fold over the ever growing forehead) and removed most of the skin from the neck with the obviously blunt rusty clippers. But it looks good at least. Nothing a few plasters and a tetanus shot won’t fix.

I don’t have a beard anymore either. In some vain and frankly rather pathetic attempt at looking my age, I have shaved it all off. That and with a little encouragement from a third party who will remain nameless Claire.

Not sure it has worked, although she apparently likes it… Grey is a colour though. And a distinguished one at that.